If we're using the hair as a metaphor for my life ... it's grown!

My last post was more than just an outlet for my feelings. It inspired me. It put a fire under my ass and I haven't stopped since. I did say, "Fuck it!" and embraced the fact that I AM hot shit! And you know what, it really had nothing to do with my hair. The hair was merely a metaphor for who I was as a person in that moment.

But if we're using the hair as a metaphor ... it's grown!

And it's been on MANY wild adventure with every inch!

Things my hair has experienced since my last post ...

• It went to Wisconsin to visit my sister and her family ... my hair had NEVER been to Wisconsin before! (Especially not alone with 3 kids in the back seat for 6 hours!)

• It watched my daughter tower of it. No hiding the grays from her!

• It kinda just sat there and smiled when it saw my Photography Certificate. (YES! Hair can TOTALLY smile!)

• It looked cute enough that I actually got up the courage to get a job for the first time in almost 7 years!

• It helped me look like a Greek Goddess for an evening!

• It gave me the courage to embrace ALL of me ... even my imperfect belly!

• It taught me to learn to love coffee! (or perhaps it was working next to Biggby that made that happen ... maybe)

• With every inch it grew it gave me more and more confidence and made it possible that I was able to meet some of the most AMAZING people.

Paul King

Brian Wheeler!!!!

Marianne Markowitz

No comments from the peanut gallery on this one!

Magic Johnson

• It blew in the wind as I stepped my feet into the FREEZING cold ocean on the shore of SC for the first time in my life!

• It smiled with me (YES Again ... hair can smile ... stop being a hater yo!) as my face cleared up completely, only raising my confidence that much more.

• It moved with me and my family to a MUCH better neighborhood in a house twice the size of our old one and in a school district that I'm more than thrilled to send my kids to!

• It (Barely) sat smooshed under my cap as I walked the stairs to accept my Associates Degree (FINALLY), while also taking a moment to catch a selfie with the President of LCC. (What? I was part of a selfie contest ... it was go big or go home! ... PS Totes won the contest with this pic too!)

• Then it watched my baby girl graduate the 8th grade. It gave me encouragement and helped me not cry too. My hair is very nice like that!

• It looked just lovely as I attended my first concert in well over 10 years. Yay Verve Pipe!!! Look, I'm in the Photograph! (bad joke)

That was this past month. My hair and I have been on SOOO many adventures this year. It's probably been the best year of my life. I've taken chances and embraced all the changes that have come my way. I've owned life! I am totes hot shit!

That's not to say my life ... I mean my hair ... has been perfect. Although my adventures have been plentiful and full of amazing experiences, this has also been a difficult year.

This past week me ... um ... and my hair ... made a really big decision. After over a month of going back and forth about whether my job was truly the right fit for me, I decided to resign. This was probably one of the hardest things I've had to do. I mean, I have spent a YEAR getting to know these AMAZING guys ...

Yesterday was my last day and I can honestly say it was painful. I am going to miss them dearly. No more Angry Pandas, no more giphys, no more Music Fridays ... what will my hair do???

But, all hair aside, I've learned some important things this year that led me to this decision.

1. People deserve respect, no matter if they are a man or a woman, no matter what kind of mood the other person is in, no matter what the circumstance. EVERYONE deserves to be respected and I will NOT put myself in a situation where I am disrespected on a regular basis. I have too much self respect and I am worth WAY more than that.
2. A leader does more than lead. A leader does not lecture, a leader teaches. A leader uses kind words to show others how to grow. A leader does doesn't hesitate to teach others everything they know because a TRUE leader wants those whom they are leading to one day be a leader as well. 
3. Standing up for yourself is important. But doing it with tact is equally as important. I may not have mastered the tactful part yet, but I have definitely lost that fear of what will happen if I DO stand up for myself and fight for what I deserve.
4. No job is worth risking your sanity, literally. Everyone who reads my blog knows my past and knows my struggles. When a job is bringing you down and leading you to the edge and making it impossible for you to move forward and/or move on, it's time to let it go. Taking care of yourself should ALWAYS be your number one priority! ALWAYS!
5. In the business world, the only person looking out for your best interest is you. No matter what anyone tells you or what promises are made, if your goals get in the way of someone else's goals, that person will most likely put their best interest first.
6. Actions speak MUCH louder than words. You can flatter a person as much as you want with tales of how much you appreciate them, but when your actions dictate otherwise, the actions will always trump the flattery.

The fact is, I want more. By this time next year I want to be proud of where I work and what I am doing. I want to be in a position that helps me grow even more. And I will admittedly say that my previous job did help me grow in many many ways, there was no more room for growth left. And unfortunately, the only way to move on was to resign.

I've got quite a challenge ahead of me. Trying to explain to a new employer why I left is NOT going to be an easy task. But I have faith and I know that I am amazing, because I also learned a lot of positive things this past year.

1. I am a fantastic Leader. I love to teach and watch those whom I am leading grow. I am kind and respectful and I am patient. All things that make a good Leader possible.
2. I am a great worker, a hard worker, and an honest worker. Despite all the unpleasant moments I encountered and all the unrealistic expectations given, I worked my damndest to power through ... and most always ... I met those expectations!
3. I can own my mistakes. I'm human and I make errors. But I don't hide from them, try to blame them on someone else, or try to make excuses. Instead I admit my faults and learn from them. You will almost never see me make the same mistake twice.
4. I can keep things to myself. I learned many things this year that I would have preferred not to. Damaging information. But they are things I'll never share. I'm not that person. I'm too classy to bow that low. I'm not vindictive like some.
5. I am an event planning ninja.
6. I am a social media maven.
7. I am an awesome panda.
8. I am the best employee one could ever have.

And all of this from a mere extra six inches of hair. Who would have imagined!!!

I don't even know if anyone will read this post, and really, writing it is more for me than for anyone that does. But if you are reading ... and you feel like life will never get better ... it can. But it's all on you. I had to chop my hair off to convince myself that everything in life is temporary. And just as I am in control of the length of my hair, so am I in control of who I am.

I am the only one who can change my attitude towards life.

I am the only one who can stop moping and start doing.

I am the only one who has the power to make things better.

I am the only one in charge of taking risks.

I am the only one who can make things better.

Once I started believing all these things, changed my attitude, started doing, started taking risks, started moving forward ... that's when it all got better.

Yesterday I took a HUGE risk. I am the reason I am now unemployed. But I will not let that stop me from doing better. I will embrace it and move forward and power through.

A year from now, I WILL be at a better job in a position I love. I will have had heartache and stress and anxiety. But I'll power through it and I will take care of myself despite all struggles. I'll continue to love my life and I will continue to always strive to be a better person than I was yesterday!

Will you?